The Perfect Angel

Thanksgiving; November 28, 2013

I just hit my peak happiness and it's by chance on Thanksgiving. THANK YOU, Zarrin, for not giving up because I realized through all of the darkness and tears that I finally and truly love you after all of the HATE and LOATHING I gave you... I hated myself more than my autoimmune and incurable disease itself. This is my honesty and I now say that I'm thankful that I have MS, because that's what's given me the dream that filled up the empty nothingness that was  my first flaw.

I no longer want to be the girl of the past who I missed and became the only me that I loved. She was my perfect angel & I'm glad that the me now is a perfectly imperfect fighter.

I was my biggest enemy but I finally gained the closure I've sought out. I went from wanting to rid the world of my uselessness by cowering to ironically fight to find ways to leave, to now wanting to do nothing less than fighting to live.

The perfect angel had a life, but that's all she truly had. She never knew how to actually live, so now I know even more so that my tattoo was meant to be with me forever.